Silence

As we are about to end our short trip in Bohol, I decided to have my quiet time in front of the white-sand beach. At six o'clock in the morning, the sun is slowly dispersing its light on all the corners of the earth, the crescent moon quietly watching the children, parents and adults playing in the waters, and the air carrying the soft sound of combined music from the lushes water and the song from radio. My eyes were so fascinated with the scene that as I talk to God I can't take my stare off the happy and playful people, the quiet blue water, the soft-white sand on the shore, and the birds flying carelessly in the sky. Some people were walking along the seashore while telling stories to each other, some doing their stretching and some, like me, seated quietly on the dry part of the shore.

God knew what my heart was at that time. I kept on thinking about that couple's retreat, about my brothers and sisters deciding to attend to something else that Sunday rather than completing the seminar, about my parents who were left at home to take care of the kids, about my classmate whom I haven't shared the gospel with, about my siblings who do not have a personal relationship yet with Jesus, about my love life, about my dgroup, about so many things. Then I started praising God for all the beautiful things He laid before me on that quiet place. And as I count them, the music of Celine Dion's Because You Loved Me filled the air as if it was my voice thanking my heavenly Dad of all the things He gave me. For all those stands You stood for me . . . For all the truths that You made see . . . For all all the joy You brought to my life . . . For all the wrongs that You made right. . . You're the One who held me up and never let me fall . . . Because You loved me . . .

He brought me to John 2:1, there was a wedding! A grand celebration of two hearts uniting to each other. Again, I remembered my siblings and I asked God that may they have a reunion with Him that day. I was so engrossed with how they will experience God. And as I was thinking about them, God's voice suddenly filled the air . . ." I love you more than you'll ever know, I love you more than you'll ever see. More than My heart could ever show, I love you more than you'll ever know. . . " Tears started to fall on my cheeks. I don't care if people around me noticed it, but it was so moving when I heard those lines. "Take my hand, we'll walk a while, we'll talk a while . . ." As I think of that wedding for my married siblings, Jesus was leading me to my relationship with Him. As I pour out my thoughts and my heart in praying for them, my Daddy held my heart and walked with me. That is what matters most to Him . . . my faith, that He knows exactly what He will do with family, that His plan for my friends are for their good, that He is faithful to His promises for the dgroup, that He will send the best man for me, that if only I trust Him fully all things will fall into places. To ease my troubled heart, my heavenly Dad assured me that He loves me more than I'll ever know, more than I'll ever see. As someone will see me at that moment, he may think that I was very silent . . . but that silence is louder more than the sound of everything else around me.

Take My hand. We'll walk awhile, we'll talk awhile.

Feel My love, always there beside you.

Be the one, I know you'll tell Me everything

You are the one I cherish more than anything

I love you more than you'll ever know

I love you more than you'll ever see

More than My heart could ever show

I love you more than you'll ever know

Think of Me. And know that I'll believe in you.

There'll always be

This precious time together

With every tear

A love so strong, no words could ever say

A love to last forever

I love you more than you'll ever know

I love you more than you'll ever see

More than My heart could ever show

I love you more than you'll ever know

Take My hand. We'll walk awhile, we'll talk awhile.

Feel My love always there beside you

Be the one, I know you'll tell me everything

You are the one I cherish more than anything

I love you more than you'll ever know

I love you more than you'll ever see

More than My heart could ever show

I love you more than you'll ever know

More Than Just Stars

Early morning of Saturday . . . February 2, 2008 . . . while it was still dark, I together with my friend Minette, were driving on the road to attend a seminar entitled, Just Give Me Jesus. It was half our way when I noticed two bright beautiful stars staring at us as if trying to get our attention from the rest of the world. They are noticeably different from among the stars in the sky that day. Beside them was a crescent moon with a little star resting on top of it . . . It was such a beautiful sight . . . driving silently, enjoying the sky (I was driving so I just peeked once in a while), savoring the peace on the road, comforted by the warmth of my car (the AC was off, it was cold that day), excited for that seminar, chatting with Minette while listening to soft music.

Anne Graham Lotz delivered God's message incredibly good. She caught my attention when she presented the gospel in a new way (at least for me). I was reminded of how much Jesus loved me that eventhough He has the power to let go that brutal suffering, to just skip that scourging at the pillar, to silent those Pharisees and Sanhedrins, to strike King Herod at that moment when he questioned Him, to just let go of His breath and not feel the pain of those huge, big nails, to ask His heavenly Father to save Him . . . He intentionally and voluntarily went thru all of those pains, hurts, tears so that I can be saved and I can be righteous in the eyes of God. The music of Fernando Ortega, composer and singer of Just Give me Jesus song, filled the coliseum while the people (mostly women) sing along with the sound of his piano. I was overwhelmed at that day while we sing praises to God. I can see "hope" everywhere I put my eyes on. I see "rainbows" filled that arena. Rainbows (sign of hope) because I can only see the colors of shirts but cannot see the faces of the people. It's as if I was inside that "rainbow".

Before finally going home, two of my friends joined me for coffee. Our conversation was so intimate. I feel so close to these ladies as we share what's in our hearts, that we can be so open and true with each other, never mind being naked or vulnerable, and having no fear of being judged.

I almost forgot about those stars we saw that morning until I got a message later that night from Minette saying that those were not just stars. One is named Venus (the brighter star) and other is Jupiter!

I searched the net about this amazing sight and I'd like to quote Francis Redy's statement on these two stars that they "resemble a pair of celestial headlights - an appropriate comparison for an event that graces the morning commute."

I knew, God gave me Jesus from the start 'till the end of that day. . . more than just stars.

Photo was taken from antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod

Unforgettables

Ultimate crush: Codename - B.S. I was in grade one, he was in grade 4. He was my bro's classmate, very neat and goodlooking (how does a 6-year old know what goodlooking means??). He was my ultimate crush until grade 3. But when I was in grade 4, I haven't seen him much. He transferred to another school for secondary level. :(
Update: he is still single! c",)

Favorite game: Taguan (hide and seek). When nothing to do at home, my siblings and I play taguan. Since I am the youngest and the smallest, I can hide anywhere. Miss playing with my ate's and kuya's.

The secret of Santa was revealed: It was early morning of Christmas 1986 when I heard my Ate telling my Nanay to put that red wallet in my stocking hung in our Christmas tree. I saw that wallet a few days ago in my Ate's bag but never thought it would be "Santa's" gift for me. I was devastated when the "secret" was revealed.

Winning a contest in Journalism: I was in the category of Copyreading and Headline Writing - English. Our team was qualified up to the national level. The event would take place in Naga City but our "beloved" school did not allow us to join. We were only two (both women) from our group who qualified to the national competition. I can't remember the exact reason why the school didn't allow us, but what remains in my mind is that our first chance to visit Bicol was cancelled.

1990 Earthquake: We were having our Filipino subject at the second floor of old high school building when the earthquake happened. I was seated in between a Christian and a Jehovah's witness classmates. The unforgettable about it was when the three of us held hands and prayed together. And the earthquake stopped, nobody was hurt in that room and even from our immediate families at home. The power of prayer.

Being sure of my salvation: 1990 in our chapel, Friday night. I was so sure I will go to heaven after believing and receiving Jesus in my heart.

Fire, almost!: College days, during one of our Physical Chemistry lab experiments. We were tasked to close a glass tubing by heating the other end. One of my classmates (bes, remember?) threw her heated glass to the sink. Without us knowing, the sink contains organic solvents! Oxygen, flammable material and heat are all present. What can you expect? Fire!!! Thank God, it was only small and was easily contained. I met our teacher (Mr. Aguilar), after about 5 years, in a convention and said he won't forget that time when we almost fired up his class. Hahaha

First tears of joy: Fourth year high school, when I won in the district level of Journalism contest. When my teacher (forgot her name though, but can still remember her face) told us that I was 3rd (not first) in our category, my tears just flowed down from my eyes. I was so embarrassed when people looked at me. But it was so good to cry out of joy.

This blog will definitely have more parts . . .

Who Am I?

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.

Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wondering heart.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
And you told me who I am.
I am yours. I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again

Who am I?
That the voice that calm the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am.
But because what of you’ve done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Fish

Have you ever wished you were a fish? Have you ever stared and entertained how a fish swims and make its way to the vast playground of water?

When I was a child, I often wonder how do fish swim so smooth and so cool and so at peace in water. I thought I would outgrown that fascination. But I was wrong, even now that I am an adult I would still stop and watch how fish makes it way up and down in water. They are so graceful and would surprise you when they just jump out of nowhere (and how can they do that?? They don't even have feet!). I love it most when I watch dolphin shows, when they do their antics and stunts and get so envy with those trainors who would even stand at the back of these dolphins and off they go as if they were surfing. I also like it when I see documentaries in television showing the life and survival of fishes. And these creatures come in different colors, different sizes, different shapes, different looks and with different styles of strokes!!! My favorite "fishy" movies are Nemo and Shark's tale. They are so cute to watch under water (even if they were just cartoons, hehe). Free Willy is also nice but it is so dramatic for me. And would you believe, I like that episode of Star Wars where there were underwater scenes? Where the Jedis hide temporarily and made agreements with this colony (okay, okay I forgot what's the name of that clan).

I also love fishing, but just the thrill of fishes eating my baits. And I get frustrated when they eat the bait but I won't be able to catch them. Haha!

Yeah, I swim but not am really a good swimmer. I can only float . . . huh!

Someday, I want to go scuba diving. Being under water and playing with these fascinating creatures. And see what its like in their kingdom . . .